Parenting

The Backchat has started

This last week I have turned into shouty mum.  I don’t like it at all.  When they go to sleep and look all angelic I feel guilty.  It’s not how I pictured being a parent.  But they keep pushing me, with the smart comments, non-stop backchat and overall reluctance to help.

It makes me sad that I can’t find a way to get them to listen without raising my voice.  I have tried everything, but they seem to tune me out when I ask nicely.  It’s hard to always be upbeat and positive when every little request is met with a challenge, that is when they finally decide to open their ears and listen to what I am saying!

Brushing teeth, doing their spelling, getting fresh air… if they would have their way they would probably be in their pyjamas, eating sweets all day and playing on the PS4 until bedtime.  Scrub that they probably wouldn’t even bother with a formal bedtime, they would play on there until they passed out on the sofa…

Whereas I am all about BALANCE.  I want to tick off education, exercise and giving their eyes a break from a screen.  That makes me the worst person EVER apparently!

I have reached the backchat stage and it’s not fun.  I guess before now they have pushed the boundaries a bit but never to the extent they are now.

Do you know what it made toddlers look like a walk in the park! Seriously if I could squeeze them back down that’s what would be happening right now.  The ten-year-old especially has an answer for everything.  I am done with the backchat.

“Don’t you want me to have an opinion” he protests loudly.

Perhaps not if it’s the exact opposite of EVERYTHING I ask!!! (this I said in my head!).

Living with backchat is exhausting.  The sleepless nights weren’t any harder than this.  Asking either of them to do anything is met with outright refusal, huffs and puffs and grumbles.

“I can’t do anything I want!” – eldest screeched dramatically!

Bearing in mind he had just come off two hours playing on his console I think that is a bit of a stretch!  It’s a very theatrical stage in parenthood this.  Lots of eye rolling, fake tears, stomping upstairs.  All I wanted him to do was go up and get dressed.  My request wasn’t outlandish.  Surely it would have been nice just to nip upstairs and get on with the task in hand.

I feel a bit hard done by as I am three years early for teenage angst!

Let’s hope its just a stage and we can work our way through the smart comments.  I have started putting restrictions on screen time when they are being particularly disrespectful.  They will find me staying strong, sticking with my guns and encouraging acceptable behaviour.

I survived the chat last month, so I am sure we will get through this too.  It guess its all part of growing up, testing boundaries then learning to work together to find a solution we are all happy with!

It’s not all doom and gloom they do have such tender moments too, when they decide they really love each other, they want to help me and they are glad that I have got them off the consoles so they have had a productive day!  They felt so happy they completed this jigsaw, the three of us with their brother power!